CHILDREN ARE PASSIONATE TEACHERS

Children live life in the present moment with passion, emotion, and a sense of awe.  They are not bogged down with an inner critical voice.  They are naturally guided by an internal knowing that they are uniquely delightful.  They are alive with passion.  If we let children be our teachers, we could learn a lot.  How to engage others with our natural charm, frequent smiling, positive anticipation, and soothing stressful situations by diverting attention.  Children have an intuitive wisdom about life’s abundant opportunities and innocently pursue possibilities with gusto and eagerness.  They are not bound by over responsibility or limited by reality.  Children mystically touch something within us that is an invitation to remember our true passionate essence.

As we become adults, we bury our passion and ritualistically pursue every day mundane routines.  We forget our goodness and zeal.  We are lost in the mechanics of our daily “should’s” and infrequently ask ourselves what we genuinely want in our lives—what are we passionate about?  We operate from “have to” versus “why not”.  We do not have to be reckless or rebellious, but we could be more attuned to our true desires.  There is always a balance between discipline and irresponsibility.   How negligent is it to constantly command ourselves to deliver above and beyond what are realistic expectations?  We end up worried and stressed.  Slow down for a moment and learn from the best natural teachers—children.  Passion—what does it mean to you?  Who do you know that lives a passionate life?  What childhood passions linger within?  Where is your inner passionate child today?

Reflection:  Spend the week asking yourself and others about passion, then write down your passions and create a plan to pursue what motivates you. 

JOYFUL NATURE—JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT

Children have fun—plain and simple.  They are creative, vibrant, and innovative.  They have a lot of energy and can drain adults, but they trigger an awareness of vanished dreams.  They joyfully live in the present moment whether having a temper tantrum or belly laughing.  Children engage us with their authentic reactions to life.  Children remind us of our lost enthusiasm and charm—our aliveness.    If we pay attention to their spontaneity, they will stir our desire to live more freely and be true to ourselves.  Children are beautiful for their simplicity and extraordinary selves.  This is true for adults as well—we are most beautiful when we are authentic and real.   Acknowledge your inner goodness and honor the uniquely exquisite person you are today.

Most of my career has centered around coaching business executives.  Years before adult coloring books were popular, I recommended to several clients to sit down with crayons in hand and engage with their children.  The typical reaction was “really, I doubt that I am going to play with coloring books.”  I knew that would most likely be the response, but I suggested this activity anyway.  The purpose for recommending “childlike” behavior was to get the left brained executives out of their “thinking mind” and into the present moment.  Living in the present moment and enjoying time with children has the potential for reducing stress and increasing creativity.  More importantly the quality time spent with family members is uncalculatable for parent and child bonding.   I know most of the creative assignments requesting clients to take time and “behave with childlike wonder” were ignored.  At minimum, the suggestions planted potential seeds of reflection on how they have lost the “fun” and innocence in their lives.  With a past client, we frequently joked about the assignment.  In our jesting conversation, I know that something was triggered within him as he still talks about it fifteen years later.  Mindfulness about joy is sometimes enough to inspire us to rethink old expectations and engage our frivolity just for the “fun” of it.

Question:  What can you do today for FUN—no purpose but pure enjoyable pleasure?

 WONDER

Wonder is defined as “a feeling of surprise mingled with admiration, caused by something beautiful, unexpected, unfamiliar or inexplicable”.   When was the last time you were momentarily awed by something inexplicable?  When have you lingered to witness a bright moon bedazzled with millions of stars?  Wonder touches something deep within us that connects us to the innocence and unexplainable in our lives.   Wonder shifts our attention from the mundane to an appreciation of the marvels around us.  How often do you notice the “beautiful, unexpected, unfamiliar, or inexplicable”?  When have you let wonder embrace you and entice you to seek your greatest potential or contemplate life’s mysteries?  Let the curiosity of wonder inspire you.

Magical—that is the pursuit of wonder.  What is magical in your life today?  How could you view situations differently, so they are enhanced with magic?  What could you pursue for the sheer joy of enchantment?  How amazing it is that we have choices about how we engage life.   We can follow wonder by simply bringing our attention to the present moment.  We can shift our focus from “oh no-not again” to “oh no—how interesting”.  We can set purposeful intentions for how we show up each day.  We can create meaningful goals that inspire us.  When living with “wonder” we are stretched to be more creative and reframe our automatic thinking and doing.  We can pursue dreams that speak to us and create lives of satisfaction and vitality

Reflection:  Practice living in the present moment with the awe of wonder for one day.

SEARCH FOR HAPPINESS—A LIFE WELL LIVED

Aristotle said, “Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.”  If happiness is our human quest and we chase external possessions or speedy solutions, we quickly learn that the expectant joy is temporary.  It is interesting that we are born with natural cheerfulness, curiosity, and fearlessness but adulthood erodes our innate jubilant spark.   We forget who we truly are at our fundamental core.   It is ironic that the very things we accumulate to make us “happy” are the economic anchors that hold us back from living fully.

The explosion of happiness research and positive psychology indicate that we are in search of more optimism and enjoyment.  On the website www.pursuit-of-happiness.org, seven habits of happy people are outlined.   The seven habits of creating authentic delight in life include:

• Healthy Relationships—Close connection to others and social interactions are paramount
• Acts of Kindness—Charity, volunteering, and compassionate behaviors increase joy
• Healthy Wellbeing—Exercising, eating well, and general well-being play a key role in positive attitude
• Pursuing Interests—Being in the “flow” by participating in activities that we love pursuing
• Spiritual Meaning—Making meaning of our existence—discovering life purpose or leaving a legacy
• Focus on Strengths—Building on our strengths intensifies confidence and satisfaction
• Positive Mindset—An optimistic life philosophy and affirmative expectations increases happiness

From this list of seven factors impacting happiness, rank them from 1 to 7 for each quality in your life.  Which one do you pursue the best?  Which one would you like to develop?  What are activities you could do to increase your happiness based on these seven qualities?

Question:  Where do I want my happiness to grow?